


"I think I'm in love with you, and I'm terrified"

by 2momsmakearight



Category: The X-Files
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-22
Updated: 2016-03-26
Packaged: 2018-05-28 07:03:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,633
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6319378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/2momsmakearight/pseuds/2momsmakearight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tumblr drabble - prompt. Follow me @2momsmakearight</p><p>Post - Sein Und Zeit, Scully gives Mulder some comfort. <br/>*NEW* FINAL CHAPTER POSTED</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

She holds his body as sobs wrack his large frame, her petite form steadying his, anchoring him as the power of his sadness threatens to wash him away. Like the desperate acts of a drowning man, his hands claw at her - gripping and pulling at her shirt, drawing her closer, needing that contact.

Her breath is hot in his ear, murmuring soothing words, willing his heart to believe her. That everything will be alright, that his mother is in a better place, a place without pain and suffering. She kisses his temple, her lips an offering to his weary soul, while her fingernails against his neck an awakening; her touch sending shivers down his arms, engulfing his skin in tingling warmth.

She moves to stand, and holds out her hand. “Come on, Mulder. You need to lie down,” she rasps, her voice thick in sympathetic emotion. He takes her hand and nods, numbly following her lead into his room, like a sleepy child being put to bed. 

He sits on the edge of his mattress as she moves around his room, every pass washing him in her scent. He reaches out and grabs her wrist, pulling her between his legs. Her hands come to his shoulders, rubbing his arms rhythmically – soothing, stroking. 

 

“You okay? Do you need anything?” she asks gently, her voice speaking into his down-turned head. She threads her fingers through his fine hair, and smiles when she feels him shiver, a small hum emitting from his throat. 

 

He feels himself swaying, missing the anchor of her body, the anchor of her presence, docking him to reality. He wraps his arms around her hips, pulling her tightly against him, buoying him in his riptide of grief. 

 

His face nuzzles her chest, her day-old scent like warm bread, comfortable, soothing, and undeniably feminine. The scent of Scully. He could live here. Right here, in the small space between her breasts.

He pulls her closer, inhaling her, his strong chin loosening the top two buttons of her shirt, and he buries his face against her chest, his breath hot and wet against her sternum. She wraps her arms around his head and holds him to her breasts, her fingers stroking his head and neck, gently rocking back and forth. 

 

“You okay?” she whispers into his hair, her warm breath sending shivers down his neck. 

 

“I can hear your heartbeat,” he says quietly, his arms pulling her even tighter against him, much to her surprise. She nods against his head, gently kissing the top of his hair. “Yeah… I’m here,” she soothes.

 

His voice is muffled against her breasts, speaking his secrets into her skin. “You’re all I have left…” 

 

His hopeless dejection cuts into her soul, and she swallows a sob as she buries her nose in his hair, the scent of him making her chest ache.

 

“Mulder,” she chokes a sob into his head, her tears dampening his silky strands. “You’ll always have me,” she whispers, their bodies rocking back and forth. Back and forth. 

 

A small gasp escapes when she feels his lips, delicate and light above her breast. His tears coat her skin. He’s nuzzling her, self-soothing, like an infant roots for his mother’s breast. 

He breathes in short puffs, coating her skin in condensation, the hot air from his lungs tightening her nipples against her blue shirt. She feels her breathing quicken as his raspy jaw leaves a burning trail against her delicate skin. 

He grips her hips, his thumbs digging into the prominent bones. “I…,” he begins, his voice choked and heavy. “You’re all I have, Scully…” he repeats, quietly sobbing against her breasts. Her heart breaks at his vulnerability.

 

She cups his face between her small hands and places gentle kisses against his forehead and temples. “I’m here… I’ll always be here,” she whispers as she trails sweet kisses against his cheeks, his teary eyelids. 

 

She pulls back slowly, and opens her eyes. His eyes are heavily lidded, tears glistening in the moonlight. “Scully…” he whispers in prayer, and his chin tilts to her in offering – her acceptance willing. Her lips are warm and soft against his, the kiss sweet and loving. “I’m right here,” she repeats, her thumbs drawing circles on his cheeks. 

 

“I think I’m in love you and I’m terrified,” he whispers, his eyes closing at his own admission. Her chest burns, and tears gather in her eyes. “You’re all I have left,” he repeats again, choking on emotion.

 

She leans down and presses her lips against his again, lingering longer than before. Her mouth slowly opens over his, her tongue tentatively exploring the recesses of his mouth. His arms pull her flush with his body, the evidence of his need for her present against her thigh, and he groans. He strokes her ribs, his thumbs lightly trailing the underside of her breasts, making her shiver as desire builds. 

 

She pulls back, and he wraps her into a fierce hug. His body shakes, and he buries his nose into her neck. “I need you, Scully,” he shudders. 

 

She turns her face into his ear. “You have me, Mulder,” she replies softly. 

 

He cups the back of her head and opens his mouth against her neck, his tongue hot and wet against her skin. She hums as a quiver ripples through her body. 

 

“Just once… I need you, Scully,” he repeats, his teeth nipping at her shoulder. 

 

She pulls back and touches her forehead to his. “And you have me… not just once, but always,” she whispers before she presses her lips to his.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The second half of the saga

\---

He moans into her mouth, her tongue soothing his weary soul. Her skin ripples under his hands and her breath hitches in his mouth, her body jerking at the electricity of his touch.

He pulls away and scoots back on the bed, pulling her towards him, her legs straddling his hips. 

“God, Scully,” he breathes into her chest, his hands cupping her ass as she rocks her hips against him. He pulls away breathlessly, looking up at her face, his eyes weary. 

“If you…, I can’t…,” he stammers, shaking his head. She shakes her head, a small smile edging her lips. “I’m yours,” she says simply, resolutely. 

He groans, and pulls her head down to cover his mouth. His tongue explores her as his hips arch up to meet the aching heat between her legs. 

It’s been so long since she’s been touched like this. She’s forgotten how good it feels. His mouth is like fire against her neck, his tongue stroking along her jugular, nipping at her tendons, marking her, claiming her. She is his.

She whimpers into the ceiling, the gush of wet warmth in her panties betraying her sense of control. She wants this. She wants him as much as he wants her. But this isn’t about her tonight. She’s saved his life countless times, helped him solve the most difficult of cases, been his best friend through thick and thin – his partner. But Mulder doesn’t need a friend or partner tonight, she realizes. He needs a woman. He needs her. 

She pushes his face from her neck and leans back, keeping her eyes trained on his as she slowly works at the buttons on her blouse. His eyes watch her hands as they pop the plastic from the hole, her flesh revealing itself with each deft flick of her wrist. She opens her shirt and his breath hitches in his throat. It’s something he never thought he would see – Dana Scully straddling his waist, shirtless, absolutely stunning in a white lacy bra. His jaw is slack and his eyelids flutter. She is magnificent. 

She reaches behind her and unclasps her bra, pulling her shoulders forward to let the straps fall. He gasps, and sighs shakily as her exquisite breasts are bared before him in offering, his for the taking. Soft, supple, her nipples stand in stark contrast to the milky white of her flesh. 

She lifts his shaky hand to her face, kissing each finger pad, her lips soft against the callused rough patches on his hands. His eyes fill with tears at her gentleness, astounded that someone…, someone like Scully, could love him as much as she does. When the final finger is kissed, she places his hand against her breast. 

She feels her nipples tighten against his skin, and he moans when he feels her warm flesh fill his palm. He wants her so badly… He NEEDS her – needs her body to erase the ache deep in his chest. 

Fox Mulder has never needed much in his life, his parent’s privilege affording him a comfortable lifestyle. But he needs Scully. And he’s never needed anyone like this before. His chest aches with emotion, both sorrow and love. Immense love. 

“Do you have any idea how much I need you, Scully?” he sighs into her chest, and she answers with a resounding groan as his mouth closes over her nipple, her whimpers shooting straight to his cock. He pushes up against her, moaning against her flesh. Their hips move together, his desire for her fueling her own, and she feels herself become wetter with each low moan that escapes from his mouth. 

She pulls at his shirt, his face leaving her breast for only half a second before he latches back on, his tongue flicking against her nipple. It feels divine. Each stroke of his tongue against her taut nipple ripples through her, and she moans against him, pushing her breast into his greedy mouth. 

She pulls his face from her and places a sweet kiss against his lips. “Lay back,” she breathes into his mouth, and he regretfully pulls from her, missing the contact of her body immediately. 

She kisses his jaw, her tongue stroking at the stubble on his skin, and leans down to whisper in his ear. “Let me make love to you, Mulder.”

He shivers, and threads his fingers through her hair as his mouth devours her. She whimpers in his mouth, and lets her tongue trace his swollen lips, teasing him. Tasting him. 

She works her way down his body, kissing and licking at his muscular flesh, warm and salty under her tongue. His skin tingles in the wake of her mouth, her nipples dragging against him, and he lifts his head to watch her move down the bed. 

So long. It’s been so long since he’s been touched by a woman – touched with loving hands. His skin is on fire, his heart lurching into his throat with each stroke of her tongue. 

His cock twitches when he feels her hand stroke him over his jeans, and he gasps at the contact. “Scully,” he breathes, incapable of anything more than a whisper. She looks up at him, her eyes full of love and understanding. “Let me, Mulder,” she quietly pleads, pulling his jeans and boxers down and off his body. 

She kicks off her shoes and removes her own pants, crawling back on the bed to lean over his hard length. His hips jerk into her hand when she takes him into her mouth, and he bites his lip to keep from calling out. Her mouth expertly moves over him, her tongue tracing the length of him before her lips engulf around his head, sucking and moving her mouth up and down his length.

He watches her move over his body, his heart burning with the love he has for her in this moment. Fresh tears spring to his eyes, and he reaches for her, needing her close to him, needing her body pressed to his.

“Scully…,” he croaks. “C’mere.” 

She straddles his hips and places her palms besides his ears, leaning down to nip at his open mouth, her teeth pulling at his bottom lip. She rubs her slickened heat against his length and he moans, wrapping his arms around her back, crushing her on top of him. She settles her face into his neck, letting him hold her – body to body, skin to skin. She feels his tears as they fall from his eyes, dripping down his cheeks, and she kisses them away. She nuzzles his nose with her own, and rests their foreheads together, breathing in the other, taking in the moment.

“You’re my only family now, Scully,” he says softly, his eyes closed, a lone tear falling from his eyes. 

She kisses his eyelids, her throat thick and heavy with emotion. “Always, Mulder,” she says, gently brushing her lips against his. “Always…”

His brows furrow and he bites his lip, choking on a sob. She lowers her face and presses her cheek to his, whispering in his ear. “Shhhh, it’s okay… I’m here…” 

His arms are tightly around her, her body melting into his. “You’re… You’re all I have…,” he sobs into her neck. She pulls away and showers his face with gentle kisses, their tears mingling on their skin. She kisses him gently on his mouth, his lips shaking under her. “Let me love you, Mulder,” she says, asking, pleading with him. She needs to give him this. She wants to give him this. 

Bringing her hand between them, she lifts her hips and slowly slides her hips down around his length. The sigh in unison as the sensation of their joining overwhelms them. She feels herself opening around him, her swollen heat enveloping him, burning with delicious ache. His hands are hard against her back, holding her body to his. Chest to chest, flesh to flesh, face to face. 

Her hips begin to rock back and forth against him, and she moans against his mouth, his own low gasps shaky against her lips. She wants him to feel pleasure. She wants him to have this. This act is FOR him, to remind him of what’s real, to remind him of love, that he is loved; that not everything he has is lost to him. Certainly, not her… Especially, not her. 

He plants his feet against the mattress, and begins to meet her gentle thrusts with his hard ones as lust finally takes over the sorrow in his heart. She whimpers and moans into his mouth, and claws at his hair. The sounds of their bodies slapping together fills the room and he groans loudly in her ear, holding her in a fierce embrace, afraid she might disappear – taken from him like everything else. 

He rolls their bodies so she is pinned under him, and he positions his cock at her entrance, a guttural moan escaping his lips as he pushes past her swollen, tender folds, filling her once again. His hips begin to pump into her and she moans into his shoulder, biting at the flesh as his cock hits the tip of her cervix again, and again. Choked sobs muffle his moans, and her own tears fall in sympathy as his cock moves quickly inside her. 

He doesn’t deserve the life of pain and loss he was given. This man, this man who would go to the ends of the world for anyone, give the shirt off his back for anyone, knows nothing but rejection and pain. 

“Scull…,” she hears him pant in her ear, his voice pained and choked. She cups his face and kisses his cheek, her lips salty from his tears. She whimpers against his skin, their breaths heated against each other. 

Bracing his arms against the headboard, he begins to pound into her forcefully. She cries out in mixed pleasure and pain and holds onto his biceps, watching his face as he moves above her. 

His eyes are tightly closed, and his forehead wrinkled as he pounds into her, her tight heat his salvation, the only thing keeping him alive in this moment. She’s all he has… The only remaining part of himself that is good and right with the world. 

Without her, he would be lost, floating away without a life preserver. He doesn’t want it to end. When he comes, he’ll be alone again. Always alone. Inside of her, he feels human– feels loved, feels desired. He doesn’t want this moment to end. 

Sweat drips from his chin, and lands in the valley of her neck, pooling there, mixing with her own, rippling as he moves above her. Her nails dig into his arms, anchoring her to the bed, her head precariously close to slamming against the headboard. His knuckles are white against the frame, his cock edging closer and closer to release. 

Tears leak from the corners of her eyes, falling to the pillow beside her as she looks up at the man above her. Not tears of pain, or injury, but tears of love, and heartache. Her heart breaks for Mulder. His sexual release is so primal, and urgent. 

But this isn’t the Mulder she loves – not the one above her, pounding relentlessly into her willing body. This is a lost, desperate man, dejected and helpless. She watches his features, mixed with pleasure and agony, both painful and exquisite. His eyes are so tightly closed it’s like he’s blocking the world from his view. She wants to bring him back – remind him that she’s here, that she’s never going to leave… That she loves him. 

“Mulder… Let go…,” she whispers up to him. He drops his head and sobs, his hips furtively stroking her raw sex, his release imminent. She reaches down to cup his cheeks, and forces his face to hers. 

“You have to let go,” she urges, wrapping her legs tightly around him, holding him to her, her words registering with more than one meaning. Let go of the past, let go of your mother, of your sister. Let go of all the guilt and pain you’re holding onto. Let go…

Her voice is soft is in his ear. “I’m right here… I’m right here with you… Mulder, let go… let go…,” she urges softly, her fingers stroking through his sweat-dampened hair. 

His sobs are muffled in her neck, and she continues pushing him towards the end. “It’s okay… I have you,” she whispers, kissing his cheek, her own tears mingling with his. One, two… four, five strokes later and he gasps into her neck, his hips jerking as he empties himself inside her. 

“It’s okay…,” she soothes, kissing his ear as her fingers stroke through his hair. “Shhh… it’s okay,” she whispers. 

His body shakes on top of hers, his breathing intense against her flesh. “Come back to me,” she whispers, gently rocking their bodies side to side. “I’m here…,” she whispers, “Come back to me.” 

She reaches above her and takes his hands from the headboard, rolling their bodies slightly to the side. Her legs remain wrapped around his hips, his cock still inside of her. Neither is willing to break the contact. 

She pulls his face from her shoulder, and brings her lips against his in a gentle kiss. “Are you okay?” she whispers against his mouth. He finally opens his eyes, swollen and red with the intensity of his emotions, and gazes down at her. She smiles gently at him, her thumbs stroking his face.

“Thank you… Thank you for loving me,” he says with such tenderness it breaks her heart. 

“God...,” she breathes, tears escaping down the side of her face. She leans forward and brushes her lips against his. “You don’t have to thank me,” she says into his mouth. 

She kisses him again, and feels her throat tighten with emotion. “You’re a wonderful man, Fox Mulder,” she says looking into his tearful eyes, her voice heavy. “You deserve love,” she says touching his hand. “And you deserve this,” she says, bringing his hand to her chest, placing it directly above her breast over her heart. 

“You never have to thank me for loving you, Mulder,” she says, shaking her head lightly, holding his palm to her body. He closes his eyes and sighs deeply, his lungs hitching in emotional aftershocks. 

He pulls her against him and spoons her back to his front, his nose nuzzling in her hair. She sighs deeply, content, and his arms pull her in. Their breaths are slow and even, and she finds herself drifting asleep. 

“I lied…,” he says softly, his quiet voice echoing in the silence. Her eyes open and she blinks, waiting for him to continue. She feels his lips press gently against her cheek.

“I said that I was falling in love with you, and I was terrified…, but I lied,” he says. She swallows thickly, and forces the lump in her throat down. 

“How so?” she whispers. 

“Because I’m already in love with you…, have been for years,” he whispers. She smiles into her pillow, warm nerves fluttering her belly. His lips against her ear send shivers down her arms. She shifts and presses her ass into his hips, his desire for her growing. She huffs, and rolls over, draping a leg over his hip. 

“Really?” she asks, an eyebrow arching in question, her eyes moist.

“Yeah,” he answers, smiling softly. His hands brush the hair from her face. “But I AM terrified. That part wasn’t a lie,” he says seriously. 

He leans down and pulls her bottom lip between his teeth and she whimpers. His cock twitches against her inner thigh, his desire for her growing once again.

“Then I guess we’ll have to be terrified together,” she says, her eyes darting between his, her own fears evident behind her blue irises. 

“Partners in everything.” He says softly, rolling on top of her, her hips arching up to meet his erection as a fresh flood of wet heat drips from her folds. 

“I thought you said ‘just once’,” she asks. His hand cups her swollen breast, tweaking her sensitive nipple and she hums in appreciation. 

“I lied.”


End file.
